Voice Dialogue Coaching: Awareness, New Choices and Change
“I had the pleasure of working with Jeannie recently for my first “Voice Dialogue” session. I found it to be very helpful. I loved the process and was very impressed with the skill and care that Jeannie showed throughout the session.
I was a bit timid going into the session, not knowing if I would be able to open up to this new way of talking with myself. Once we got going it was great, I uncovered a couple things about myself that helped soften a heavy issue for me. I now can see this side of me in a new refreshed, healthier way. I have gained new tools to use when this issue comes up again in my life. And in a way I feel like I have re-written part of my life experience to reflect the healthier side of the situation. And in so doing, I am not as attached to the turmoil that was cycling through me daily about this situation.
I feel like I am able to honor myself in a more complete way then I did before I had the Voice Dialogue session. I have more peace and am excited to take other issues I am having through this insightful process. “
– Cathy, A. Olympia, WA
Which of your Selves
is Driving the Bus?
What is Voice Dialogue?
Voice Dialogue is a powerful coaching technique to help us step into different parts of ourselves and give them voice in order to gain clarity and freedom. The aim of Voice Dialogue is to strength the “Aware Ego” to give us more choice and power in our lives.
Voice Dialogue was initially developed in 1972 by Hal Stone, PhD and Sidra Stone, PhD.
As a trans-cultural – and remarkably inclusive – psycho-spiritual approach to consciousness, this work has been used internationally by:
- individuals for their own personal growth
- professionals in the fields of psychotherapy, counseling, personal coaching, business or organizational consulting
- others who have found that it enriches bodywork, acting, script writing, meditation, yoga, and weight loss programs.
The Theory of Voice Dialogue
- You are not one, but many. Voice Dialogue is the basic method for contacting, learning about, and working with the many selves that make up each of us. Voice Dialogue is a specific method developed to explore the world of the Selves – also known as sub-personalities.
- The Psychology of Selves provides a clear explanation of how these selves operate in your life and how they keep you from realizing your full potential. Voice Dialogue helps you to learn how these selves determine the way you see the world, control your behavior, and limit your choices. Most of us live a much smaller life than necessary. Voice Dialogue helps you to learn to be more than any one of your individual selves.
- Relationship: Our relationships (both personal and professional) are controlled by these selves. The Stones’ approach to relationship – their theory of bonding patterns – provides an easy to understand technology of relationship. Learn how the difficulties in your relationships can be the source of creative change, of greater control over your life and behavior, and more joy.
What does a Voice Dialogue session look like?
This method requires two people: a facilitator and the subject being facilitated. Our job as facilitators is to help you become aware of, and to experience, the various Selves that run your life and to learn how to use them in a conscious way through the development of an Aware Ego Process.
During the session, I will ask you what you would like to work on. Together, we will be looking for the voice of a “primary self” – one of your primary sub-personalities who often runs the show. For example, most of us have a “go-getter” or a “pusher” who wants us to get a lot done and have a lot of accomplishments. Another possible primary self is “a nice girl” who doesn’t want to make others mad or a “strong man” who doesn’t cry. Really, any part of ourselves that “lead” us is a primary self. The key is to understand when a part is in charge and to be at choice about who is “driving the bus.”
Once we have identified a part, I will ask you to move your chair over to one side or the other, and we will actually have a conversation with that part. This can be done in person or over the phone or Skype. The goal here is to gain a perspective of separation from that part – that this part is not all of YOU. So, I will basically interview that part and find out about it.
Next, you will move back to your original chair – what we call “center,” and reflect on whatever came up for you.
The next part of the process is very interesting. The theory is that for every primary self that operates within us, there is an equally strong, somewhat opposite disowned part. So, for example, the go-getter might be covering up a disowned part that really just wants to “be”. The nice girl might have a really angry part that isn’t allowed. The strong man might be protecting a very vulnerable little boy. I will ask you to move into “an opposite” and move your chair to a different spot. We will see what emerges (rather than thinking it out ahead of time), as there are many possibilities for an opposite and sometimes we might be surprised by who comes to chat. Again, we will have a conversation with that part.
We will come back to center for any reflections and observations.
The rest of the session will be spent working with awareness of the parts, and conversation about moving forward, depending on what is needed.
That is a short introduction of Voice Dialogue coaching. We will have time to answer any questions you might have about the process prior to our session. Both Mark and Jeannie and available to facilitate you in a Voice Dialogue session.